Who Tells You The Truth?
Today, I want to share another lesson from the life of Ulysses S. Grant. As I’ve been reading Ron Chernow’s biography of him, I’ve found much to reflect on. The key idea I want to highlight is this: Surround yourself with people who will tell you the truth.
While Grant is widely known, his most trusted staff officer, John A. Rawlins, is less so. Rawlins, a self-made man and lawyer, was indispensable to Grant. The son of an absentee, alcoholic father, Rawlins lacked formal military education but was straightforward, dependable, and highly capable. He approached his duties as a Union officer with near-religious fervor—especially when it came to defending Grant and protecting him from alcohol.
Rawlins was a strict advocate of temperance, while Grant, though brilliant, struggled with occasional binge drinking. Aware of his own tendencies, Grant understood that once he started drinking, he couldn’t stop. When Rawlins joined Grant’s staff, he secured a pledge from Grant to maintain sobriety. From that point on, Rawlins went to great lengths to shield Grant from temptation.
As Grant’s fame grew during the Civil War, so did the opportunities for well-meaning admirers to offer him alcohol. Rawlins, recognizing Grant’s extraordinary leadership abilities, feared that drinking would jeopardize both his command and the Union’s path to victory. He was one of the few people who could openly chastise Grant—especially if he suspected him of indulging in alcohol. Other officers were often shocked by Rawlins’ frankness, but Grant, surrounded by politically minded, scheming generals, deeply valued his honesty.
Rawlins consistently reminded Grant of his pledge, his immense responsibility as a leader, and the potential consequences for the entire nation if he allowed alcohol to interfere. His unwavering vigilance largely kept Grant in check, enabling Grant to focus on defeating the Confederate army. Far from resenting Rawlins’ interventions, Grant later expressed profound gratitude for his friendship and his invaluable role as a staff officer.
One can only imagine how history might have unfolded differently if Grant didn’t have Rawlins in his corner.
The lesson is clear: Surround yourself with people who hold you accountable, who are honest with you, and who want the best for you—even when it’s difficult.
Give it some thought. Do you have anyone in your life who will speak the truth to you?
Here’s to surrounding ourselves with people who will tell us the truth.
Happy to be in your corner,
Tom Page, LCPC
Want to support my work? Click the Tip Jar link below to help me create more free resources!
Want to receive Transformation Tips directly to your email?
Subscribe below!
